Landslide by Stevie Nicks is one of my favorite songs. The WORDS are just so real. It's exactly how I'm feeling right now.
"I took my love and I took it down
I climbed a mountain and I turned around
and I saw my reflection in a snow covered hill
'til the landslide brought me down
oh, mirror in the sky, what is love?
can the child in my heart rise above?
can I sail through the changing ocean tides?
can I handle the seasons of my life?
I don't know
Well, I've been afraid of changing
cause I built my life around you
but time makes us bolder
even children get older
and I'm getting older too (repeat 2x)
I'm getting older too
so, take this love
take it down
if you climb a mountain and you turn around
and if you see my reflection in the snow covered hills
well, the landslide will bring it down
down
if you see my relection in the snow covered hills
well, maybe, the landslide will bring it down
the landslide will bring it down"
Stevie Nicks is one of my FAVORITE artists. This song makes me think of love and loss. These two human emotions are the strongest, I believe. I'm rambling, I know, but I'm feeling very....nostalgic tonight. I'm confused about ME. I'm confused about what I want, who I am, where I'm at, who I'm WITH. I know that I should be fighting, fighting HARD for the kind of love Matt and I have, but sometimes "the landslide will bring it down". I can't fight if he surrenders.
2.19.2009
2.15.2009
Unoriginal
I took a friend's advice (Thanks Brittany) and told Matt that, yes, I loved my coffee mug, BUT I really would have loved to have something a little more "traditional" for Valentine's day (aka, flowers, chocolate, jewelry). He said, and I quote, "I THOUGHT about all those things, but then I realized that they really aren't very original. I wanted to get you something that you could say, "Well, that's Matt."" I can DEFINITELY say that, honey! It reminds me of a story I heard a few years back. A friend of a friend was dating a guy that was really into his car. For Valentine's Day one year, he bought her two new tires....for HER side of HIS car! What exactly do you say to that gift?
Matt's co-worker also had a very "original" gift for his wife this Valentine's Day. Him and Matt were shopping together. If they wouldn't have been, I fear I may not have received ANYTHING. Anyhow, Chance (Matt's friend/co-worker) walked up to the register while Matt was buying my coffee mug with.....a birdhouse. His wife got a new birdhouse for Valentine's Day! The best part of that is, he bought it because HE wanted it!
Well, I least I can USE my gift! I'm drinking coffee from my mug right now. She gets to have bird's shit all over her gift! Now THAT'S original!
Matt's co-worker also had a very "original" gift for his wife this Valentine's Day. Him and Matt were shopping together. If they wouldn't have been, I fear I may not have received ANYTHING. Anyhow, Chance (Matt's friend/co-worker) walked up to the register while Matt was buying my coffee mug with.....a birdhouse. His wife got a new birdhouse for Valentine's Day! The best part of that is, he bought it because HE wanted it!
Well, I least I can USE my gift! I'm drinking coffee from my mug right now. She gets to have bird's shit all over her gift! Now THAT'S original!
2.14.2009
New Love
I was grocery shopping (compulsively again) the other day when I was travelling down the canned food asile, and came across the applesauce. I'm not a huge fan of plain applesauce, so imagine my surprise when I looked up and saw....FLAVORS. Not just your regular cinnamon, either! Mango-Peach, Pear, and Strawberry. What a surprise! I haven't tried the other two yet, but the Mango-Peach is my new love!!! DELISH!
2.13.2009
Men Just Don't Get It
What's so hard about knowing what a woman wants? Really. We're actually pretty simple. We want affection, understanding, sympathy. We want to be held and left alone. We want to be able to cry without a man constantly asking 'what's wrong?' or 'what did I do?'
For Christmas we want more than a flashlight. For our anniversary, we want more than, well....nothing. For Valentine's Day, we want more than a coffee mug. Okay, I'll give it to him. It was a very nice coffee mug. It's hand crafted and made with Oklahoma clay, and painted with non-lead based paint. Nice right? Why can't I get flowers??? I know that they die, but they're pretty while they last. Why can't I get chocolate? I know I'm on a "diet" and that I would sit and eat the whole box, but it still tastes good. Why can't I get a spa gift certificate? I haven't been to the spa in a few years. It would feel really great to get a massage and a facial. Better yet, why can't I get that engagement ring that I've been waiting on for two years????
I get a coffee mug. For Valentines Day. It's not even pink. Or red. It's green. What exactly is a coffee mug supposed to symbolize? I really don't think Matt has a clue.
So, while he's sitting here watching one of the THREE James Bond movies I got for him for V-Day, I'm sitting on the opposite couch typing what an insensitive ASS I think he's being. The thing is, I think he really means well. He just doesn't get it.
For Christmas we want more than a flashlight. For our anniversary, we want more than, well....nothing. For Valentine's Day, we want more than a coffee mug. Okay, I'll give it to him. It was a very nice coffee mug. It's hand crafted and made with Oklahoma clay, and painted with non-lead based paint. Nice right? Why can't I get flowers??? I know that they die, but they're pretty while they last. Why can't I get chocolate? I know I'm on a "diet" and that I would sit and eat the whole box, but it still tastes good. Why can't I get a spa gift certificate? I haven't been to the spa in a few years. It would feel really great to get a massage and a facial. Better yet, why can't I get that engagement ring that I've been waiting on for two years????
I get a coffee mug. For Valentines Day. It's not even pink. Or red. It's green. What exactly is a coffee mug supposed to symbolize? I really don't think Matt has a clue.
So, while he's sitting here watching one of the THREE James Bond movies I got for him for V-Day, I'm sitting on the opposite couch typing what an insensitive ASS I think he's being. The thing is, I think he really means well. He just doesn't get it.
2.10.2009
I Have Enough Friends, Thanks!
I can't stand it when salesgirls try to be your friend. Yesterday, while I was out running errands, I stopped into a couple stores to buy a few new clothes. I went into this one place, where I swear, corporate must send these girls off to a seminar on 'How to Be Your Customer's Friend'. One called me 'sweetheart'. I felt like telling her, "HONEY, I'm old enough to be your big sister!" The other one walked around calling me 'girl'. Really, how demeaning is that? "Girl, that will look great on you!" "Girl, you want me to put that bag behind the counter while you shop?" NO! I want you to stop calling me girl! And, if I didn't want to hold my bag, I would have taken it to the car. It's not really THAT long of a walk! Mental note: never return to that store!
2.09.2009
Mother Teresa?
This is Molly. Molly loves to sleep underneath the blankets. In fact, when it's bedtime, she'll jump on the bed and paw at the blankets. If I don't lift them up immediately, she'll look at me, tilt her head to the side, making her big, long ears flop all over the place, asking "What's wrong with you? Can't you see that I'm cold?" So, I lift up the blankets and she burrows underneath, all the way to my feet. In the morning, she gets up, shakes, and goes to the couch, where she continues to sleep....underneath the blanket.
2.08.2009
Random Things You Probably Didn't Know
1. I lead a diet/weightloss team online with over 27000 members.
2. I would rather clean the toilet than do the dishes.
3. I have three part-time jobs.
4. I love to sleep, and whenever the alarm goes off, no matter WHAT time it is, it angers me!
5. I can't stand making my bed, but before I crawl in every night, I have to fix the covers from the night before. It drives me NUTS when my feet poke out from the bottom.
6. I love lip gloss. I love it so much that I collect it, like someone would stamps or coins. I don't use it all. I can't. I have too much, but it's an obsession. I can't stop. HELP.
7. I really love to take baths, but I like the water so hot that I almost can't stand it. I like it when my skin turns red. Unfortunately, I get it so hot that I can only stay in for about 10 minutes. Then I'm done.
8. I find older male movie stars much more attractive than the newer age stars. Men like Cary Grant, Gregory Peck and Sean Connery were really good looking when they were young.
9. I'm a compulsive grocery shopper. I always go to the store hungry, and buy nearly everything I see that looks like I may eat it. I usually spend more money on food than I do on shoes. And I spend a lot on shoes.
10. I'm a list-maker. I love grocery lists, to-do lists, and any other kind of list. I write it all down, then I re-write it. Then I place little check marks or smiley faces next to something when I complete it.
11. I love to cook. I don't do it often enough, because Matt doesn't like to eat healthy foods, and it's really difficult cooking only for one, but I find that the simple act of cooking really calms and relaxes me.
12. If it was up to me, every room in my house would be lit up with candles. Matt thinks I'm going to burn down the house one day.
13. I love to practice yoga.
14. I used to think that I was ready to get married, and I would definitely say "YES" if Matt asked, but sometimes I ask myself if there's something else out there for me.
15. I can change my own oil, my own tires, and my own brakes.
16. I have a savings account that my boyfriend knows nothing about. My own little nest egg.
17. With a few exceptions, I hate other women. Girls are petty, insecure, backstabbing, bitches.
18. I love costume jewelry. Big fake gemstone rings are my favorite.
19. If I was building my own home (I will one day), I would build it in the Spanish adobe style. The inside would be decorated with the crazy colors too...blues, reds, yellows.
20. I get really excited when the time comes to change the page on the calendar.
21. My birthday no longer makes me happy. When did this happen????
22. I hate to drink. There are occasions when I wouldn't mind getting smashed on either wine or vodka and cranberry juice. A good margarita is always okay, too. But, for the most part, I hate to drink.
23. I'm scared to lose weight. I know I'd look great if I lost more than I already have, but I'm terrified of also losing my curves. I love my curves. My boobs would shrink too, and I really don't want those to go!
24. I think that Chuck Norris ROCKS!
25. If you talk to me within two hours of my waking up, or before I've had my coffee, you will get yelled at. I'm a morning grouch.
26. I hate talking on the phone. This has probably led to the reason I only have a handful of friends.
27. I have two dogs. Poncho is a Blue Heeler mix, and Molly is a beagle.
28. I absolutely LOVE brownies, and will eat a whole pan of them by myself if allowed.
29. When I cook, I don't measure. This has come from a about 20 years of experience. I can "guesstimate" pretty well.
30. I practice yoga. I love the way that it "centers" me.
2. I would rather clean the toilet than do the dishes.
3. I have three part-time jobs.
4. I love to sleep, and whenever the alarm goes off, no matter WHAT time it is, it angers me!
5. I can't stand making my bed, but before I crawl in every night, I have to fix the covers from the night before. It drives me NUTS when my feet poke out from the bottom.
6. I love lip gloss. I love it so much that I collect it, like someone would stamps or coins. I don't use it all. I can't. I have too much, but it's an obsession. I can't stop. HELP.
7. I really love to take baths, but I like the water so hot that I almost can't stand it. I like it when my skin turns red. Unfortunately, I get it so hot that I can only stay in for about 10 minutes. Then I'm done.
8. I find older male movie stars much more attractive than the newer age stars. Men like Cary Grant, Gregory Peck and Sean Connery were really good looking when they were young.
9. I'm a compulsive grocery shopper. I always go to the store hungry, and buy nearly everything I see that looks like I may eat it. I usually spend more money on food than I do on shoes. And I spend a lot on shoes.
10. I'm a list-maker. I love grocery lists, to-do lists, and any other kind of list. I write it all down, then I re-write it. Then I place little check marks or smiley faces next to something when I complete it.
11. I love to cook. I don't do it often enough, because Matt doesn't like to eat healthy foods, and it's really difficult cooking only for one, but I find that the simple act of cooking really calms and relaxes me.
12. If it was up to me, every room in my house would be lit up with candles. Matt thinks I'm going to burn down the house one day.
13. I love to practice yoga.
14. I used to think that I was ready to get married, and I would definitely say "YES" if Matt asked, but sometimes I ask myself if there's something else out there for me.
15. I can change my own oil, my own tires, and my own brakes.
16. I have a savings account that my boyfriend knows nothing about. My own little nest egg.
17. With a few exceptions, I hate other women. Girls are petty, insecure, backstabbing, bitches.
18. I love costume jewelry. Big fake gemstone rings are my favorite.
19. If I was building my own home (I will one day), I would build it in the Spanish adobe style. The inside would be decorated with the crazy colors too...blues, reds, yellows.
20. I get really excited when the time comes to change the page on the calendar.
21. My birthday no longer makes me happy. When did this happen????
22. I hate to drink. There are occasions when I wouldn't mind getting smashed on either wine or vodka and cranberry juice. A good margarita is always okay, too. But, for the most part, I hate to drink.
23. I'm scared to lose weight. I know I'd look great if I lost more than I already have, but I'm terrified of also losing my curves. I love my curves. My boobs would shrink too, and I really don't want those to go!
24. I think that Chuck Norris ROCKS!
25. If you talk to me within two hours of my waking up, or before I've had my coffee, you will get yelled at. I'm a morning grouch.
26. I hate talking on the phone. This has probably led to the reason I only have a handful of friends.
27. I have two dogs. Poncho is a Blue Heeler mix, and Molly is a beagle.
28. I absolutely LOVE brownies, and will eat a whole pan of them by myself if allowed.
29. When I cook, I don't measure. This has come from a about 20 years of experience. I can "guesstimate" pretty well.
30. I practice yoga. I love the way that it "centers" me.
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